This past week, I filmed the video for The Place Beyond! This is only the second professional video I’ve ever done, and this process of seeing my song come to life has been so enriching for me. Although I’ve been writing songs for over a decade, it’s just in the past year- especially in the past 6 months- that I feel like I’m really ready to show up and be present as the musician and artist and person I’ve always wanted to be.
The abstract colors and stars and clouds in the video are images that speak to my soul. I’ve always felt like I was a little weird and out of the box, but I’m finally starting to see that the more I embrace that part of myself and don’t try to change it, the more it flows and takes on a life of its own. This is the first group of songs I’ve written where I can say that I genuinely don’t care what people think or how it is received. I got to a place emotionally where I was finally raw and real enough to let my guard down and just say what I had to say. No filters, no worrying about how it will look.
And this video I feel perfectly captures the vague abstractness that I love. I feel like I am able to bring that down and ground it in myself and in reality. And it was so fun!! Somewhere on my way to becoming “a real musician,” I forgot that the primary goal of all fo this is to have fun. And that that in itself is meaning enough. Hopefully that shows.
This is also the first album that I’ve produced and mixed by myself. I’ve always had a producer brain and have been involved with it to some degree, but in the past I doubted myself and just assumed that other people knew better than me- although I must say, I have learned a tremendous amount through taking classes and working with others. But it’s tricky to find that balance and know when you’re ready to really dive in and own it.
As I’ve been fully present during this production process and absolutely loving it, I’ve found other artists and creatives to work with who also are passionate about what they do- reflecting my joy back to me.
The amazing director of this video, Kira Bursky at All Around Artsy, shares a similar passion for the abstract- and this video would not have been possible without her. I feel like I’m finally starting to gather a team of people who share similar goals and love what they do, and that is making a huge difference for me. As artists, we tend to isolate ourselves and think that no one understands us. I felt that way for many, many years. But, as I’m starting to experience now, following my pure joy and passion without any expectation from others ironically connects me with others who are doing the same thing. So it all works.