I am a bit outside the box. For me, music has always been a way for me to make sense of what doesn’t make sense. I consider myself to be an empath / intuitive, so I feel emotion very intensely. For a large part of my life, I didn’t know how to deal with that, and it lead to me detaching and shutting down my presence in how I interact with the world. I appeared very withdrawn and shy and unapproachable. I have by no means gotten over that completely, but the older I get, the better I feel at letting more of my true self show and interacting with people more easily.
I started playing piano when I was around 10. I studied music in college and had some voice training there. But at the time, as I was still very withdrawn, I had trouble singing loudly and staying on pitch. I had heard people say that it was possible for anyone to learn to sing- so I thought, “Well, if that’s true, I’ll be the proof.” So I guess it’s true! While there are many singers that are a lot more skilled than me and have a much bigger range, I’ve learned to embrace the unique qualities of my voice, and I think it fits the type of music I do.
Speaking of my music, it’s hard to put myself into a genre. The closest one I’ve found is “dream pop.” Synthy, light, layered vocals, but I also love me some beats! It’s a fun combo. Most of the songs I make are ones that I need to make in order to process what I’m feeling at the time. An eternal optimist, I find it very hard to sit with emotions that are negative or that don’t make sense to me. So I do my best to transmute any negative things I’m going through into something that’s hopeful, or at the very least, to offer a wider perspective to myself. So it’s a form of communicating with myself- sometimes I think of it as my higher self talking to my 3D self.
I mentioned spirituality too- to me music and spirituality are indistinguishable. I’ve always been a “seeker,” interested in the paranormal, the Twilight Zone-y things that don’t quite make sense in the way that most people interpret them. I’ve always had an intrinsic knowing that there was more to life than what we perceive with our five senses. To me, music kind of epitomizes all of these things: how can something that has no mass and no physical form, convey the depth and range of feeling that can transform people’s lives? It’s almost like it’s a higher density form of communication and expression that we’re able to understand and integrate in our 3D lives. I think that while it’s considered “entertainment,” it’s also much more than that. It’s healing, it’s expression, and it’s the transmutation of feelings that are…maybe a bit too big and dense for us to do on our own. It helps us move tremendous amounts of energy, and that to me is magic.
Anyway- I could talk about this stuff all day. While I’m just starting to release music and content into the world, I’m very excited to see how my journey grows, and to connect with more people who share this kind of calling and inspiration- in whatever form it takes for you.
In love and light,